my OLD me

Arini sgt moody.. Rase cam nk nanges! Lewat malam semalam, YM ngan Shamel. Borak punya borak, tiba2 dye ckp saya cam daBERUBAH. Dye ckp saya da xmcm dulu. Dye cakap lagi, dye ske saya yg dulu. And... dye nak saya jd cam dulu..

I’ve ever thought about this before. But then… I tried my best to see it in a positive way. I pretend not to care but in fact, I keep thinking about it. Perhaps it was just my mind that thinks too much about those changes. Tp lepas Shamel ckp macam 2, I think he was true. Definitely true! OMG, I hate being like this!

Saya pon rase yg saya da tak macam dulu. I miss my old me! I don’t know since when I’ve changed. Perhaps I’ve changed since the moment I was not being able to study in law. Or perhaps since my closest friends left me for studying abroad.. Or perhaps since the heartbroken season. Huk3..

I miss my old me! Serious! A simple SITI NURQIMAH with a free thoughts, free spirits and freedom of expression. The one that always being herself in her own way. But sadly, SITI NURQIMAH today is not similar as SITI NURQIMAH before. I want back my old me! I wanna cry whenever I was heartbreaking.. I wanna yell out whenever I got heated.. I wanna talk to my friends whenever I feel depressed.. It is really hard! Really.. Very hard!

Saya da tak nangis ble sedey, saya da xmarah2 ble sakit hati, saya da jarang ngadu kat kawan2 ble unhappy.. I don’t know whether it is a good signs or not. Yes, I’m growing in a mature way. But I hate being like that. I just want my old me.. The one with freedom of expression.

Tp saya sekarang mcm kosong. Da tak colorful mcm dulu2. Da x happy mcm dulu. Mcm tak berperasaan. Entahlah, xtaw nk ckp mcm mane.. Da lame x nangis ble kena marah.. Da kureng bersedey ble xdpt apa yg saya nak.. Da x ambitious mcm dulu. Da xrase bedebar ble borak ngan tut.. Da tak rase excited ble cite psl tut.. All those feeling have gone…… cleaned by the wave of my changes that I really hate!